10 Things Successful People Never Do Again

10 Things Successful People Never Do Again Never go back. What does that mean? Fromobservations of successful people, clinical psychologist and author ofNever Go Back 10 Things Youll Never Do Again(Howard Books, June 2014), Dr. Henry wolke has discovered certain awakenings that people have in life and in business that once they have them, they never go back to the old way of doing things. And when that happens, they are never the same.In short, they got it.Years ago, a bad business decision of mine led to an interesting discussion with my mentor, Dr. Cloud says. I had learned a valuable lesson the hard way, and he reassured me The good thing is once you learn that lesson, you never go back. You never do it again.I wondered, what are the key awakenings that successful people go through that forever change how they do things, which propel them to succeed in business, relationships, and life? Dr. Cloud continues. I began to study these awakenings, rese arching them over the years.Although life and business have many lessons to teach us, Dr. Cloud observed 10 doorways of learning that high performers go through, never to return again.Successful people never again1. Return to What Hasnt WorkedWhether a job or a broken relationship that was ended for a good reason, we should never go back to the same thing, expecting different results, without something being different.2. Do Anything That Requires Them to Be Someone They Are NotIn everything we do, we have to ask ourselves, Why am I doing this? Am I suited for it? Does it fit me? Is it sustainable? If the answer is no to any of these questions, you better have a very good reason to proceed.3. Try to Change Another PersonWhen you realize that you cannot force someone into doing something, you give them freedom and allow them to experience the consequences. In doing so, you find your own freedom as well.4. Believe They Can Please EveryoneOnce you get that it truly is impossible to plea se everyone, you begin to live purposefully, trying to please the right people.5. Choose Short-Term Comfort Over Long-Term BenefitOnce successful people know they want something that requires a painful, time-limited step, they do not mind the painful step because it gets them to a long-term benefit. Living out this principle is one of the fruchtwein fundamental differences between successful and unsuccessful people, both personally and professionally.6. Trust Someone or Something That Appears FlawlessIts natural for us to be drawn to things and people that appear incredible. We love excellence and should always be looking for it. We should pursue people who are great at what they do, employees who are high performers, dates who are exceptional people, friends who have stellar character, and companies that excel. But when someone or something looks too good to be true, then they probably are. The world is imperfect. Period. No one and no thing is without flaw, and if they appear that way, hit pause.7. Take Their Eyes Off the Big PictureWe function better emotionally and perform better in our lives when we can see the big picture. For successful people, no one event is ever the whole story. Winners remember that each and every day.8. Neglect to Do Due DiligenceNo matter how good something looks on the outside, it is only by taking a deeper, diligent, and honest look that we will find out what we truly need to know the reality that we owe ourselves.9. Fail to Ask Why They Are Where They Find ThemselvesOne of the biggest differences between successful people and others is that, in love and in life, in relationships and in business, successful people always ask themselves, What part am I playing in this situation?Said another way, they do not see themselves only as victims even when they are.10. Forget That Their innerhalb Life Determines Their Outer SuccessThe good life sometimes has little to do with outside circumstances. We are happy and fulfilled mostly by w ho we are on the inside. Research validates that. And our internal lives largely contribute to producing many of our external circumstances.And the converse is true People who are still trying to find success in various areas of life can almost always point to one or more of these patterns as a reason they are repeating the same mistakes.Everyone makes mistakes even the most successful people out there. But what achievers do better than others is recognize the patterns that are causing those mistakes and never repeat them again. In short, they learn from pain their own and the pain of others.A good thing to remember is this Pain is unavoidable, but repeating the same pain twice, when we could choose to learn and do something different, is certainly avoidable. I like to say, We dont need new ways to fail the old ones are working just fineOur task, in business and in life, is to observe what they are and never go back to doing them again.A version of this article originally appear ed on SUCCESS.com.Dr. Henry Cloud is a clinical psychologist and leadership coach and has written and co-written more than 20 books, including his latest, Never Go Back 10 Things Youll Never Do Again (June 2014).

How to Deal With a Micromanaging Boss Who Slows You Down - The Muse

How to Deal With a Micromanaging Boss Who Slows You Down - The MuseHow to Deal With a Micromanaging Boss Who Slows You Down Tzu siches nothing left to tackle on your to-do list. Unfortunately, its not because youve been a productivity superstar. Its because every last thing on your list is at a standstill- pending an approval, edits, or guidance from your manager. Managers often do this with the best of intentions. They want to see, review, and endorse everything that goes out of the department to make sure its the best it can be. But in the process of doing that, emails build up in their inboxes, and employees sit around, waiting for the approvals they need to move on with their projects. How do you handle a bottleneck thats impeding your ability to get your work done? Here are a few tips to deal with a micromanaging boss.Plan for ItYou know that friend whos late to everything? Shes the one who says Im almost there when she hasnt even pulled out of her driveway yet. You may deal wit h her perpetual lateness for a while, but when you know theres an important event that she absolutely has to be on time for- like your wedding- you tell her that it starts an hour earlier than it actually does. And then she shows up perfectly on time. In the same way, you have to plan ahead when you know youre going to encounter a bottleneck. That could, for example, mean getting the report into your managers inbox a week earlier than you otherwise would, to allot some extra time for him or her to review and approve it. Or, if youre writing a company newsletter, maybe you get your managers approvals on each of the story ideas before you actually start writing- instead of working to complete the entire newsletter and then presenting it to her approval, forcing a tight deadline that probably wont be met.Remind, Remind AgainThe absolute worst thing you can do is send a request or assignment to your boss by email, and then simply wait (and wait, and wait) for a response. Thats practical ly begging for your task to get caught in the bottleneck.At the root of the issue, your boss is probably very busy (and perhaps a bit disorganized)- and that means that he or she may need a reminder or two to make sure tasks get accomplished. So, maybe you email your boss on Monday afternoon with your request or assignment for review. On Tuesday, as you pass by his office during lunch, you stop in and say, Just wanted to remind you that I need your review and approval on the Smith proposal by end of day on Wednesday- its in your inbox now. And then Wednesday morning, you pop in again to ask, Will you be able to get me your changes and approval this afternoon? I can re-send if you need.I know, it sounds annoying. But frankly, your boss will likely appreciate the reminders- and if it helps you get what you need, its ultimately helping your boss (and the entire department) succeed. Ask to Take the LeadWhile its clear that your manager prefers to review and approve everything that goes through the department, if you make him or her feel mora confident in your abilities, he or she may be willing to hand over the reins.For example, I recently had a manager who liked to have the last look at everything my team and I wrote- down to the most mundane emails- and it was significantly slowing down everyones progress. I finally took a gelegenheit standing my ground on a small assignment I knew I had nailed Hey Lisa, there are two webinar invites that are due today. I reviewed the copy and there were very few edits. I know you have a lot on your plate already would it be OK if I went ahead and moved them forward?She (somewhat reluctantly) agreed, and I was finally able to cross that item off my to-do list- and she saw that it turned out fine. Once I had tested the waters, I slowly started feeling more confident about making those calls on other assignments I dont think this one needs your review, so Im going to go ahead and finalize it. Is that OK? And most of the time, she agreed. Sure, if we were writing a company-wide email communication on behalf of the executive team, wed need her approval. But if I was making minor edits to an existing sales brochure or PowerPoint deck, she agreed that she didnt need to review. And that opened up her time and loosened the bottleneck. Have a Frank ConversationOf course, your boss may be more of a stickler- and his or her response to your attempt to sidestep the established process may be, No, I still need to review it. Ill get to it as soon as I can.In that case, you need to address the issue more directly. During your regularly scheduled one-on-one meeting (if you dont have one set up- you should), bring up the issue and how its affecting the team I know you have quite a few projects and assignments that are waiting for review. Is there a way we can make the process more efficient? Is there anything I can do individually to make it easier on you? For example, maybe shed prefer you to specify the deadline in the subject line of your email, so she can prioritize her inbox based on whats due immediately. Or, maybe your boss would prefer that you bring a list of pending items to a weekly abfertigung meeting, and you can address any questions- and immediately check off approvals- as you go. But even if you cant determine an immediate solution, alerting your boss directly will help him or her realize its not just a matter of disorganization or an overflowing inbox- its a problem thats impacting the entire teams productivity. And that can be the wake-up call your boss needs to figure out a solution.Photo of hose drip courtesy of Shutterstock.